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10 Secrets Happy Couples

They might be 30, or 75. They come in all colors, shapes, sizes and income brackets. It doesn’t matter how long they’ve been together. Whatever the demographics, when you see a happy couple, you just know it!

How do these couples stay in love, in good times and in bad? Fortunately, the answer isn’t through luck or chance. As a result of hard work and commitment, they figure out the importance of the following relationship “musts.” Because few couples know about all of the musts, I think of them as the relationship “secrets.”

Happy Couples and Their Secrets

1. Develop a realistic view of committed relationships.

Recognize that the crazy infatuation you experienced when your romance was new won’t last. A deeper, richer relationship, and one that should still include romance, will replace it. A long-term relationship has ups and downs, and expecting it will be all sunny and roses all the time is unrealistic.

2. Work on the relationship.

An untended garden develops weeds that can ultimately kill even the heartiest plants. And so it is with relationships. It is important to address problems and misunderstandings immediately. Some people believe good relationships just happen naturally. The truth

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Is your marriage alive and well, or is it time to dial 911? Chances are the health of your relationship falls somewhere in the middle — slightly out of shape and tired. Unfortunately most of us tend to take the health of a marriage for granted. And we don’t realize how important a happy, healthy relationship is until it’s time for marital CPR.

Maintaining personal health requires work — exercise, good nutrition, rest and regular checkups. No one teaches us that the same kind of maintenance is also necessary in order to keep a marriage alive. Love between a parent and child is unconditional. Love between a husband and wife is not. As divorce statistics would indicate, an untended marriage falls apart too easily. The good news is that there are ways to make a marriage survive, and better yet, thrive.

Your Marital Diagnosis

There are warning signs or “symptoms” when your marriage is “under the weather.” Here are some key symptoms:

  • feelings of chronic resentment toward your spouse
  • lack of laughter between the two of you
  • desire to spend free time with someone other than your mate
  • too much time spent playing the “blame game”
  • conversations between you are laced with
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It’s not long ago that men were expected to do all the chasing and make all the decisions when it comes to dating. But how much has this changed in the 21st century?

A survey by DatingDirect.com suggests a new trend — women are becoming sassy and assertive, while men are remaining more traditional in their approach to courtship.

In the survey of over 2,000 people, women reported being less shy on dates than men (29 per cent versus 44 per cent), and making more effort with their appearance — half choose smart, sexy clothes on a first date, whereas 78 per cent of men go for the casual and relaxed look. Women also like to keep the finances on an equal footing. Seventy per cent prefer to split the expense of a date, or pay for themselves. However, 52 per cent of men believe it’s their time honoured duty to pay.

Darren Richards of DatingDirect.com concludes: “The rules of dating may be changing for some, but the concept is still as popular as ever.”

But what might be stopping you from taking the first step? Sometimes even very intelligent, funny, confident women don’t ask guys out because

Dating services have been around for decades, but it's only been in the past 6 or 7 years that they've really taken off online. Here are a few tips we've cobbled together that should help you safely navigate what is, for many, new online terrain.

Staying Anonymous for Awhile
Most online dating services use a double-blind system to allow members to exchange correspondence between each other. This allows members to communicate, but without knowing each other's email addresses or other identifying personal information. It's best to use the dating service's internal, secure messaging system until you feel as though you know the person to some degree. This ensures that when you do run into the inevitable creep online, you remain anonymous and safe.

Be Realistic
Prince (or Princess) Charming may very well indeed be waiting for you online, but you should also set your expectations just a little bit lower. Most of your dates will turn out to be duds. That's just the statistics! So it helps prepare yourself if you remember that going into the online dating process. Don't believe that everyone who shows interest in you is worth your time. And don't get disenchanted if your first date decides they

By the time people seek marriage counseling, they usually arrive armed with an arsenal of complaints about their partners: “She isn’t affectionate enough,” “He’s so insensitive,” “She wants to control everything,” “He doesn’t listen to me,” “She’s never on time,” “He’s so tight with money.”

Therapists’ walls echo with accusations as people point fingers at one another in an attempt to explain what they see as the source of their own discontent.

False, harsh consolation

After a litany of blame, accusation and lamentation, clients are often “consoled” by their therapists with the harsh reality that, “You need to realize that there isn’t anything you can ever do to get your partner to change. People are who they are. You can’t teach an old dog new tricks, especially one that’s not interested in learning any, so you need to simply accept your spouse or else get out of the relationship.” There’s nothing you can do to change them!

But what people fail to realize, including many marriage counselors, is that we can change other people. In fact, we have the power to create dramatic and long-lasting changes in those around us. The secret lies in how we target our energy and efforts, because our

When the Beatles wrote, “All you need is love à” they should have added, “and the wisdom to work through tough times, even if it means seeking professional help.” This is because counseling can be a relationship-saving resource for couples. Couples counseling is also known as marriage counseling or marriage therapy when the two people involved are married.

When Counseling Can Help

Perhaps blowups between you and your partner are occurring more regularly. Or ongoing sticky issues and irritations are causing increased tension and resentment. If you have had little success working through relationship issues, find yourselves avoiding each other, or using hostile words or actions that cause emotional or physical hurt, professional counseling may help.

Sleep or sexual problems, extreme moodiness or feelings of dissatisfaction, loneliness, sadness or failure also can be clues that something is wrong. Couples counseling can uncover the underlying issues.

There may be external factors that can add stress to your relationship, including:

  • Birth or adoption of a child
  • Step-parenting
  • Infertility
  • Chronic illness or disability
  • Substance abuse
  • Infidelity
  • Financial problems
  • Career pressures

Professional counseling can help you learn coping strategies for such periods of transition or stress.

Finding a Therapist

Your local mental health association, family doctor, clergy or friends are good referral sources. Look for someone whose education

What to keep in mind when things heat up at the watercooler.

One of my best friends is a social worker at a community mental health center. She took the position immediately out of college, viewing it as a natural step in the development of her career.

Within the first month, she found herself working closely with a handsome speech pathologist who treated a number of her clients. Now, many case meetings and treatment-plan reviews later, they’re engaged.

Bet you’re not surprised—or shocked. Most people crave social interaction and companionship. What better place to find it than on the job? After all, office life is hospitable to the development of romance on many fronts. Daily interaction, a safe and generally dependable environment and common interests are all conditions that can ignite an initial spark between two people.

Casual interactions, from laughter over a cup of coffee or heated discussions in the conference room to mutual schmoozing at a trade show, can naturally evolve into attraction. However, reconciling the personal and professional benefits and the perils of an office affair is a formidable task.

Dating a coworker may seem an ideal solution for those who just don’t have the time to meet a potential partner.

Whenever someone asks me how I met my wife, I proudly say, "Online!" But of course, I think to myself... Where else would one meet up with one's significant other nowadays?

Actually, my attitude is probably not the norm in society. At least not yet. But before long, it wouldn't surprise me to find that online dating has surpassed other forms of meeting one's significant other. Why? Because it is more efficient, produces better matches (and dates!), and allows love to bloom when the silly things (such as actually having something in common) are already taken care of ahead of time.

More Efficient

Using online dating services are far more efficient than other methods of dating. Getting set up by friends or family is purely a hit-or-miss proposition. While well-intentioned, friends and family often don't really know us half as well as they think they do. We don't often share all of the intimate details of our lives, our likes, dislikes, hopes, and dreams for the future with everyone. So people can get somewhat biased ideas of what we're like, because they only see what we're like with them.

Office romances, while convenient, are often fraught with possible problems, danger, and role conflicts. Meeting

Michael and Gwen enter the counselor’s office and nervously take their seats. Michael fidgets and stares at the floor while Gwen sits upright, looks toward the therapist and utters the words that marriage counselors hear so frequently, they can almost say them in unison, “Doctor, we’re not like most of the couples you see… we don’t have any really serious problems; he doesn’t drink or beat me or chase other women—nothing like that. Our problem is that we just don’t communicate.”

“We just don’t communicate.” The cry is frequent and the assumptions are clear: Communication means a better marriage; more conversation means more connection; increased interaction means increased intimacy. It all sounds logical enough—or does it?

Brace for fallout

In the past, I might have rushed in with a glut of techniques to help a couple like Michael and Gwen accomplish their stated goal of better communication. But over the years I’ve learned that working to improve marital communication is a lot like exploratory surgery: The risk of what might be exposed is fraught with peril. Couples need to brace for the potential fallout that better communication may bring before they recklessly plunge ahead with the scalpel.

Good communication involves both partners being

Finally, you have met him or her. You know what I mean, the one. All your life, or so it seems, you have been waiting for the person who made your heart pound, made the stars bright, and taken over all reasonable thought processes with ideas of making love on every beach from here to Tahiti.

You have a weird expression on your face, food suddenly seems like a mere inconvenience and sleep is just something you used to do. Your friends tease you about being in love. Your mother WARNS you about being in love.

Of course, you’re not stupid. You’ve been around (more than Mom knows about), and you have spent time in meditation/therapy having explored your own needs in the world. You want a soul mate but this guy/gal is just so sexy that it’s hard to imagine introducing him/her to your parents at all.

Going Public

So, things are going well and you are looking toward the next step, becoming an item. Going public. Everyone knows and invites you as a couple. People you know speculate about the future of your relationship. But the future means forever when it comes to commitment, so how do you know if this is

Falling in Love is important and an art form, but sometimes, we also need to learn how to fall out of love.
Be it a hurtful relationship we have to leave or being stuck in love with somebody, who we are not together with anymore, unable to get it over it.

It happens to most of us at some point in time, that is why I want to share with you a process designed by Richard Bandler, one of the founders of NLP.


1. Think of the person that you want to fall out of love with.
2. Remember all the good memories about being with them by seeing yourself in the memories. See the movies run backwards and make them all in black and white and small.
3. Remember all the times they treated you badly and all the negative feelings around them by imagining yourself looking at them inside the image, fully associated to what has happened.
4. Take every bad thing they did and imagine all of them, one after another as if played back to back on a movie screen. Run this movie over and over until you get sick of it.

The problem is that you need to know how to love yourself unconditionally, because this is the only method that you can “conquer” a woman.

What are the “buttons”?

It is not like having your own charming machine, but every woman has her buttons that need to be pushed. Here are some ideas that might help.

1. Touch emotional subjects

Subjects such as childhood and her plans on long term, and talking about the passions of her is a good idea. They are all subjects that would awake her interest about you.

2. Women want a leader

While you talk, take over control and don’t be afraid to impose the subject of the discussion. Even if she might be annoyed, she will see that you are the leader. Don’t overreact! If she does not want to talk about her mother, don’t push the subject just to show that you can obtain what you like.

3. Be careful about gestures!

All the clues given by a woman are in her gestures! All the non verbal reactions are there. For example, if you sit too close to her, you might spit her when you talk, and she will definitely show you that this is annoying.

4. Be charming and funny, not

Many men have asked this same question. They say that women can be very difficult to read, but it is really not that hard. I suppose it is not a guarantee, but here are some questions that will give you a good indication of whether or not she’s in love with you.

FIRST: Does she show an interest in everything about your life? If she wants to know about your family, your work, your friends, your hobbies, etc., it is a pretty good indication that she is in love with you. If she didn’t care about those things then you would have something to worry about.

SECOND: Does she call you for no real reason? She just wants to know what you are doing, how you’re feeling, or maybe what is going on at work. That is really just a reason to call you. She obviously has you on her mind.

THIRD: Does she spend as much time as she possibly can with you? She may call her friend or her sister and tell them she is sorry but you called so she has to cancel her plans with them. After all, you are the most important person for her to be with.


There are many singles bars popping up in many places these days. In a regular life situation, it might be difficult to meet someone interesting. Most of the time we are so tied up with our work, we hardly find any time to socialize. Even if we find some time to socialize, some of us might feel shy or awkward to approach a person who is sitting at the other end of the bar chatting with another friend or chilling out with a group of friends. There are many things that can bother us when we have to approach another person. Most often we worry if the other person would be interested in talking to us or what if the person would turn out to be as we expected or not.

So the first question is how do you know if a girl would be interested in talking to a you or not when your eyes are set on a particular girl in the singles bar. If you are a good observer, you might get several hints that whether this person would be interested to talk to a new person or not. Usually a girl who is already in a relation

Latinos are the fastest-growing ethnic minority group in the United States, and most are of Mexican origin, previous research has shown. The Latino culture, more than others, places a high value on the family unit; yet, little research has examined the dynamics of Latino family relationships and how those dynamics affect children’s development. Now, a University of Missouri researcher found sibling relationship quality in adolescence affects Mexican-origin adolescents’ and young adults’ later depressive symptoms and their involvement in risky behaviors, including those with sexual risk.

“Similar to work with European-American and African-American families, we found adolescents with sibling relationships characterized as positive or negative, and we also found a group that we labeled ‘affect-intense’ because siblings in this group experienced moderate levels of intimacy and negativity,” said Sarah Killoren, an assistant professor of human development and family science at MU. “An important difference, however, is that we didn’t find an ‘uninvolved’ group among Mexican-origin siblings in which siblings have low levels of intimacy and low levels of conflict. This may be due to the cultural emphasis Latino families place on family interdependence. Research shows Mexican-origin siblings spend more time with their brothers and sisters than with their parents and

It is time to make your relationship the best it is with these love-improving tips from Zodiac sign. Deep down inside, all of us know why we need love. It makes us feel satisfied, fulfilled, and most deeply loved. Follow your sign to consider your existing, long-term, or future soulmate of what his/her number 1 love need.


For those who are Aries, they need a partner to be up-front with them and hate waiting. The impatience or lack of spontaneity is a killer to kill their love. The worst thing is that their lover can hide something from them. Be up-front!


For Taurus lover, gentleness is the essential. There is no rough edge, tasteless appearance, crude speech, or rough handling. Refinement rules Taurus heart. As their lover can’t be civilized, it isn’t possible to overlook or forgive it.


With Gemini Lover, communication is the most important point. You need to receive a phone call, text, and e-mail every day. Being out of the touch is the kiss of death. Try to communicate with scent, taste, and touch to make the love work.


For those who are Cancer, they are protected by their partner, but don’t forget to protect him/her. That is the main point

Dating can be unpredictable. It’s not unlike selling a car: You wonder whether the person you’re going out with is kicking the tires with serious interest or whether they’re just taking a test drive for the fun of it, with no intention of pursuing a relationship with you. But you’re not just the seller — you’re the buyer. So you want to determine as soon as possible whether your date is worth any more of your time. If you spot any of these five signs, there probably isn’t a love connection.

Communication is the key to healthy personal relationships but, as with many things in life, there has to be a balance. A date who’s a blabbermouth can spoil an evening. It’s no fun when the person talks so much that you can’t get a word in edgewise. Make a serious note when that guy or girl talks specifically about himself or herself all the time — positively or negatively. And if he or she keeps bringing up a past relationship — Blah, blah, blah! — then you’ll really want to think hard about going out with the person again.

The polar opposite — when your date doesn’t talk enough — is

Young men’s interest in babies is associated with their physiological reactivity to sexually explicit material, according to new research published inPsychological Science, a journal of the Association for Psychological Science.

The study showed that young men who reported more interest in babies showed a lower increase in testosterone in response to sexually explicit material than men who weren’t as interested in babies.

“Our findings show there is a strong mind-body connection: Liking or not liking babies is related to how a man’s body — specifically, his testosterone — responds to sexual stimuli,” explains Dario Maestripieri of the University of Chicago, lead researcher on the study. “These results suggest that even before young men make actual decisions about marriage and children, one can distinguish between individuals who are more fatherhood-oriented and those who are less fatherhood-oriented.”

According to evolutionary life history theory, there is a trade-off between an individual’s ability to invest resources in mating and his ability to invest in parenting. The researchers hypothesized that testosterone, the primary sex hormone in males, may be a physiological mechanism underlying this tradeoff. If this is the case, men who are more fatherhood-oriented and follow a ‘slow’ life-history strategy would show less testosterone reactivity

A new meta-analysis study conducted by Syracuse University Professor Stephanie Ortigue reveals falling in love can elicit not only the same euphoric feeling as using cocaine, but also affects intellectual areas of the brain. Researchers also found falling in love only takes about a fifth of a second.

Results from Ortigue’s team revealed when a person falls in love, 12 areas of the brain work in tandem to release euphoria-inducing chemicals such as dopamine, oxytocin, adrenaline and vasopression. The love feeling also affects sophisticated cognitive functions, such as mental representation, metaphors and body image.

The findings raise the question: “Does the heart fall in love, or the brain?”

“That’s a tricky question always,” says Ortigue. “I would say the brain, but the heart is also related because the complex concept of love is formed by both bottom-up and top-down processes from the brain to the heart and vice versa. For instance, activation in some parts of the brain can generate stimulations to the heart, butterflies in the stomach. Some symptoms we sometimes feel as a manifestation of the heart may sometimes be coming from the brain.”

Ortigue is an assistant professor of psychology and an adjunct assistant professor of neurology, both in

Have you ever been waiting for Love, waiting, waiting, and waiting? It seems that your desired partner has yet to appear, so you have to go on waiting for the haft part of your life. Perhaps, timing is very troublesome when it comes to meeting an individual you feel compatible with. Your birth chart may be perfectly aligned. If you both are not ready for love, it never unfolds.

Timing Is The Main Ingredient To Make Love

When we talk about timing, we know what we really mean. Timing is about life circumstances being in alignment in such a way that a perfect partner is in a place to commit to a relationship. We get ready to receive and give love to someone. The zodiac signs are aligned, and you and your mate get the green light for the understanding, romance, and possibility of love. When both of you don’t have the same mindset, your concentration is on everything, but in a personal relationship. At that sense, Timing is not right.

Timing is the most important ingredient to make a Love Relationship. Thus, Love cannot lack of it. For instance, when you focus on your job or bounce back from the heartbreak, the