Monthly Archives: July 2015

Dating can be unpredictable. It’s not unlike selling a car: You wonder whether the person you’re going out with is kicking the tires with serious interest or whether they’re just taking a test drive for the fun of it, with no intention of pursuing a relationship with you. But you’re not just the seller — you’re the buyer. So you want to determine as soon as possible whether your date is worth any more of your time. If you spot any of these five signs, there probably isn’t a love connection.

Communication is the key to healthy personal relationships but, as with many things in life, there has to be a balance. A date who’s a blabbermouth can spoil an evening. It’s no fun when the person talks so much that you can’t get a word in edgewise. Make a serious note when that guy or girl talks specifically about himself or herself all the time — positively or negatively. And if he or she keeps bringing up a past relationship — Blah, blah, blah! — then you’ll really want to think hard about going out with the person again.

The polar opposite — when your date doesn’t talk enough — is also uncomfortable. An articulated pause is one thing but extended periods of silence are downright awkward. Distractions like texting, talking on the phone or taking long bathroom breaks are dead giveaways that the two of you aren’t clicking.

Unless you’re a glutton for punishment, you probably don’t want to pursue a relationship with someone who offers up excessive criticism during your date. Perhaps he looks at you from head to toe then smirks, or she sarcastically questions your mannerisms, mode of transportation, where you live or why your parents gave you your particular name. If he’s rude to the wait staff and constantly complains about the food, he may have underlying issues you don’t want to be bothered with. You’ll also want to make a mental note if your date derides other people’s features, clothing, cars or lifestyles. Do you really want to hang out with a person who enjoys putting others down?

It’s important to monitor the temperature on your date – and we’re not talking about the room temperature. If your date gives you the cold shoulder (as in not wanting to hold hands) it’s probably a hint. The same applies if your potential sweetie rejects a modest peck on the cheek. The other extreme can also signal trouble. Let’s say your date keeps talking about sex or can’t seem to keep his or her hands off you, although you hardly know each other. This overwhelming affection may have more to do with your date’s high libido than your irresistibility. If you’re into one-night stands then you’re probably on track to get lucky. Otherwise, rushing into intimacy can doom the chances of a long-term relationship.

Young men’s interest in babies is associated with their physiological reactivity to sexually explicit material, according to new research published inPsychological Science, a journal of the Association for Psychological Science.

The study showed that young men who reported more interest in babies showed a lower increase in testosterone in response to sexually explicit material than men who weren’t as interested in babies.

“Our findings show there is a strong mind-body connection: Liking or not liking babies is related to how a man’s body — specifically, his testosterone — responds to sexual stimuli,” explains Dario Maestripieri of the University of Chicago, lead researcher on the study. “These results suggest that even before young men make actual decisions about marriage and children, one can distinguish between individuals who are more fatherhood-oriented and those who are less fatherhood-oriented.”

According to evolutionary life history theory, there is a trade-off between an individual’s ability to invest resources in mating and his ability to invest in parenting. The researchers hypothesized that testosterone, the primary sex hormone in males, may be a physiological mechanism underlying this tradeoff. If this is the case, men who are more fatherhood-oriented and follow a ‘slow’ life-history strategy would show less testosterone reactivity to short-term mating cues than men who adopt a ‘fast’ life-history strategy.

The researchers recruited 100 young men, mostly university students, to participate in their study. The men were all heterosexual, and none of them was a father. The participants completed a 12-item questionnaire that gauged their interest in babies and how they would respond to babies in various scenarios. They also completed a 20-item survey that assessed their life-history strategy. On the survey, the participants rated their level of agreement with statements like “I have to be closely attached to someone before I am comfortable having sex with them” and “I often get emotional support and practical help from my blood relatives.”

After completing the questionnaires, the participants provided a baseline saliva sample. They were then left alone in the testing room to watch a 12-minute video featuring explicit erotic content. A saliva sample was taken once the video was over, and again 10 minutes later.

As the researchers predicted, young men who showed greater interest in babies tended to report a stronger orientation towards family and long-term relationships (a ‘slow’ life-history strategy) compared with men who were less interested in babies.

Importantly, the results showed men who were more interested in babies tended to show relatively smaller increases in testosterone in response to the sexually explicit video. This association was not influenced by participants’ relationship status.

There was no evidence of a relationship between baseline testosterone levels and interest in babies, indicating that the results were not related to testosterone function more generally but were specific to reactivity to sexual stimuli.

“Young men who don’t like babies as much get more physiologically aroused by visual sexual stimuli; this makes sense from a life history perspective,” says Maestripieri. “These men ‘live on the fast lane.’ They are attracted to and aroused by novel sexual partners and are ready to take advantage of new sexual opportunities when they present themselves.”

“By contrast, young men who like babies more are less sexually aroused by novel sexual stimuli (for example, erotic content), but they presumably enjoy sex more in the context of stable monogamous relationships with partners they know well.

“We think that showing these mind-body connections is very novel and very exciting,” Maestripieri concludes.

A new meta-analysis study conducted by Syracuse University Professor Stephanie Ortigue reveals falling in love can elicit not only the same euphoric feeling as using cocaine, but also affects intellectual areas of the brain. Researchers also found falling in love only takes about a fifth of a second.

Results from Ortigue’s team revealed when a person falls in love, 12 areas of the brain work in tandem to release euphoria-inducing chemicals such as dopamine, oxytocin, adrenaline and vasopression. The love feeling also affects sophisticated cognitive functions, such as mental representation, metaphors and body image.

The findings raise the question: “Does the heart fall in love, or the brain?”

“That’s a tricky question always,” says Ortigue. “I would say the brain, but the heart is also related because the complex concept of love is formed by both bottom-up and top-down processes from the brain to the heart and vice versa. For instance, activation in some parts of the brain can generate stimulations to the heart, butterflies in the stomach. Some symptoms we sometimes feel as a manifestation of the heart may sometimes be coming from the brain.”

Ortigue is an assistant professor of psychology and an adjunct assistant professor of neurology, both in The College of Arts and Sciences at Syracuse University.

Other researchers also found blood levels of nerve growth factor, or NGF, also increased. Those levels were significantly higher in couples who had just fallen in love. This molecule involved plays an important role in the social chemistry of humans, or the phenomenon ‘love at first sight.’ “These results confirm love has a scientific basis,” says Ortigue.

The findings have major implications for neuroscience and mental health research because when love doesn’t work out, it can be a significant cause of emotional stress and depression. “It’s another probe into the brain and into the mind of a patient,” says Ortigue. “By understanding why they fall in love and why they are so heartbroken, they can use new therapies.” By identifying the parts of the brain stimulated by love, doctors and therapists can better understand the pains of love-sick patients.

The study also shows different parts of the brain fall for love. For example, unconditional love, such as that between a mother and a child, is sparked by the common and different brain areas, including the middle of the brain. Passionate love is sparked by the reward part of the brain, and also associative cognitive brain areas that have higher-order cognitive functions, such as body image.

Ortigue and her team worked with a team from West Virginia University and a university hospital in Switzerland. The results of the study are published in the Journal of Sexual Medicine. 

Ortigue worked on the love study with colleagues Francesco Bianchi-Demicheli (Geneva University Psychiatric Center, Switzerland), James Lewis (West Virginia University), Nisa Patel (graduate student in SU’s College of Arts and Sciences) and Chris Frum (West Virginia University). Ortigue’s follow-up study about the speed of love in the human brain is expected to be released soon.

Have you ever been waiting for Love, waiting, waiting, and waiting? It seems that your desired partner has yet to appear, so you have to go on waiting for the haft part of your life. Perhaps, timing is very troublesome when it comes to meeting an individual you feel compatible with. Your birth chart may be perfectly aligned. If you both are not ready for love, it never unfolds.

Timing Is The Main Ingredient To Make Love

When we talk about timing, we know what we really mean. Timing is about life circumstances being in alignment in such a way that a perfect partner is in a place to commit to a relationship. We get ready to receive and give love to someone. The zodiac signs are aligned, and you and your mate get the green light for the understanding, romance, and possibility of love. When both of you don’t have the same mindset, your concentration is on everything, but in a personal relationship. At that sense, Timing is not right.

Timing is the most important ingredient to make a Love Relationship. Thus, Love cannot lack of it. For instance, when you focus on your job or bounce back from the heartbreak, the timing to meet someone new is not suitable. Your concentration is elsewhere, and so are your heart and mind.

Relationship timing is hard to understand. It is so tough to know how we really know when the timing to meet our partner is right or wrong. Everything relies on our thoughts and what we need to find out what we want from the potential one and the future relationship.

The Law of Attraction

The law of attraction means that we draw everything to us from our thoughts and what we focus on, and then concentrate on what we want and make it clear. Let your wishes show up, and no need to focus on them so much because timing is sometimes within your control. Don’t hope so much to get terrible disappointments. Just know and prepare for what you need to do. Those wishes and even love will come.

Instead of staying at home, you should go out with friends and enjoy everything around you like foods, drinks, and landscapes. It is difficult to find the compatible partner as sitting home alone. Be confident in who you are to gain happiness and joy in your life. That is an easy way to attract someone to your life. Now, you know the law of attraction, right? Take action now.